God’s Way Ltd And Divine Truth Volunteering
So there have been some major changes for me over the last few weeks, which is very necessary to fill in anyone who is currently donating to me.
I just finished my last week of volunteer work with God’s Way Ltd and I am no longer a Member of the organisation.
Some of you may be a little shocked about this, but that’s really because I have not kept you up to date with what’s going on personally for me.
For those who know me, and some who don’t, you may know that one of my more insidious and sometimes blatant personal issues is my desire to not take full personal responsibility for my personal desires, actions, and creation. I want other people to support me through the creation, action, and the correction of any problems that arise. Sometimes this can be simple as being needy, sometimes consistently, for a pat on the back and being told that ‘you’re doing fine’. If I feel I’m completely out in uncharted waters I tend to want someone to take over, with a demand that it’s no longer my problem. At times, this can also translate in a lack responsibility in being thorough and precise in what I do.
This type of behaviour has happened more often lately and especially has been directed towards my dad and the director’s of God’s Way Ltd.
My work with God’s Way Ltd. has been negatively affected by this more and more lately but more than anything else it also means I have been working for God’s Way Ltd. but not acting and creating using my own desires.
During my time with God’s Way Ltd. I was given loving feedback about this issue and others. That’s what they do in God’s Way Ltd. But last month the directors and founders decided (correctly) that by allowing me to keep working for the organisation they actually they were making it easier for me to keep away from the process of solving my personal problem and making real shifts on the emotions that cause it.
Specifically the problem is that I am not acting on my personal desires, and not relying on my own personal energy and meaning I completely miss out on learning soul-based personal responsibility, which happens naturally during that process.
If no one else was there to look over what I create before I share it (and fix it up for me if I made a mistake), it would be much more likely that I would have to learn why being thorough and precise is so damn important.
So, I was asked to step down as member of God’s Way Ltd. (which I did, since I am not currently upholding the terms of the God’s Way Ltd. constitution) and my time volunteering for God’s Way Ltd. and Divine Truth Ltd. has ended.
I did enjoy my time and learnt a lot while working with God’s Way Ltd. and now have new skills and knowledge I didn’t even know I needed before I started working for the organisation.
…..I can drive a freaking tractor….like drive it well….
I still completely support God’s Way Ltd. and Divine Truth Ltd. and what they are trying to accomplish and, once I have done some real solid and thorough work in line with my personal passions, I hope to be able to provide them with information, results or projects that I have created and have personally run. But all that really is dependant on my next actions.
Next Steps
That leads to the question to what am I doing next?
To preface my answer, I do have to say that I have made plans and shared them before and yet nothing has happened afterwards. I have shown a propensity to procrastinate on personal creation and action. I won’t lie I’m really fucking scared of creating something that will challenge my personal issues of responsibility and the anger, fear, and internal grief that support the current status quo of inaction in my life. Plus I have a internal feeling that tells me I will get in so much trouble working for myself and in my desires.
I doubt I’m alone in this. However, I still got to make plans and act on them if I’m ever going to feel through the problem.
Short Term Goals
To pay the bills and stay active I am starting part-time paid work with a business that cleans and maintain homes and gardens of people who are disabled in some way and are unable to do these things themselves. This is contract work paid by National Disability Services. This business has been created by some friends who have had to quickly learn how to run and account for their business, and manage others in a professional manner.
Meanwhile Dad and Mary have graciously agreed to me completing gardening and landscaping tasks around their home and property, also as part-time paid work. They are very busy editing the audio and video latest Divine Truth Ltd. Assistance Group and have very little time to spend on the outdoor maintenance tasks and environment projects that they have going on their personal property.
Both as a necessity for these new jobs and for the future of my own personal desires I’ve had to start a business. Specially I’ve started as a sole trader under the business name of ‘One Soul Services’. The name is intentionally vague, since I plan to be doing all kinds of different stuff under this name. I’ve also got myself public liability insurance.
For all of those out there who had a real hard time sourcing insurance during the God’s Way Ltd Volunteer Selection Project, the trick for me was to talk to an insurance broker. They may cost a little more, but they will do all the hard work and a good one translates the legalese for you, and save you a tonne of time.
While I understand many of you out there have probably a business in some way shape or form, this is the first time I’ve started something like this on my own back.
The next step, short term for me, is to write up the policies and procedures needed to start a Blue Card (working with children) business application. Which leads to my longer-term goals
Longer Term Goals
Then what I want to start doing is what I had started telling people I will be doing years ago. I would like for One Soul Services to work with families, providing advice and solutions to relationship issues between children and their parents using God’s Principles of Love and Truth. This work will be donation based.
I plan to offer two ways to do this, which are very similar to the way I worked with Eloisa & Peter Lytton Hitchins before God’s Way Ltd. was created and also during my time in the organisation.
One way would be to spend consecutive time with families as a guest, get to know them and to provide information on how these families interact and how this could change to be more moral and ethical. This can be done by creating a plan of action with the parents and providing information on the parent’s behaviour and attitudes that are creating/leading the current family environment.
The other way would be to conduct a homestay with families (the ideal time period being a month) and provide consistent and timely feedback as these families interact. This would be a lot more powerful for families since their more unloving interactions would be harder to hide and it would be harder for the parents to dismiss or minimise feedback that is presented as soon as an issue or problem was noticed in how the family interacted.
I can’t take full credit for these ideas, since these were discussed and improved on with Jesus, Mary & Eloisa and refined by using Eloisa & Pete’s family as a first test. Depending how it goes, these family mentoring projects may need to be further refined.
My second longer term plan is to try and create a curriculum with lesson plans teaching children and teens how to engage in some of God’s principles like Love, Truth, Responsibility, and engageing in their personal passions in their life and share these with teachers and schools free of charge.
I’ve tried write these lesson plans before, but I have found that I really have no idea what I am doing, and a lot of what I have written up is not professional or clear in nature. Which leads me to think I will need some further education.
Plans For More Education
With what I wish to accomplish long term I am thinking I may need some further education. I personally find the idea of organising my life to study full time and organising the study itself quite challenging and fear inducing, but I do feel I would benefit greatly from studying and starting it this year.
The first idea is that I actually bite the bullet and apply to university to start studying to be a Primary School Educator. I always wanted to be a teacher of children and this study would give me the information I currently need to know how to write up clear and consistent lesson plans and curriculums and (hopefully) how to teach large groups of kids effectively. Plus, in time I do want to start my own school, being a qualified teacher would be the first step for this.
The second is study some form of parent and/or child psychology and therapy. This means focusing completely on family and child relationships with the goal to be able to provide actual counselling to families rather than just advice. This would provide a little more of a legal framework around what I want to create long term for One Soul Services.
Conclusion
So far I’ve been very resistant to sharing whats going on personally for me over the last two years. I get worried that what I want to share with you could be for poor reasons, like I could be looking for certain reactions from you, the reader.
But the original point of this blog site, was to show what emotional change would look like over time for two people who felt that they were soulmates.
Even though it’s now just me, it’d be better to try and give you an accurate idea of what’s occuring for me than to give you little or no information at all. That way, when emotional change does occur you will be able to see where I started.
Thanks for reading. I hope you all are surviving in these pandemic times, and are also planning to act on your personal desires, if you are not already.
I have recently been considering similar issues in myself so thanks for sharing. It’s good to hear where you’re at and I truly wish you well.
Thank you. I found that helpful and relatable! I tend to grind to a hault under my own steam in these areas. I’m sure you’ll be fine